i kind of regret right now
June 27, 2012-3:25 am
the past few days i have been wondering if i am making the right decision to fall in love with you. to be honest, i am scared that you will fall victim to your addictions well before i am ready to give you up, and to start a relationship knowing full well that the person youre with is engaging in risky behaviours might not be the best plan. and statistically, you are probably a bad choice because theres a better chance that i will lose you in a couple of decades than someone who is maybe younger, healthier, more careful.
but i dont believe in absolutes, and i dont believe in guarantees. sometimes, the most obviously responsible choices turn out the worst in the end. theres no certainty that anyone will see tomorrow. so what kind of criteria is that?
perhaps the best thing would be just to let this happen, and let whatever happens happen. weaker people than i have gotten through much worse than this. why throw away what is certainly love in hopes of finding something safer? i think anyone who understands would say that its better to experience perfection briefly than mediocrity continuously. there will never be proof that youre wrong or right until it is too late.
so, lets just do this.